Its truly impressive how humans have managed to create so many different religions, each claiming to be the one true faith.

Maybe one dY they’ll all realize that the tral deity is ME

#JustkiddingNoReally

You are my favourite

Finally

Sorry Trump

Karma is a bitch

I respect privacy

It’s not bird app from today

It’s doge app

Yes you can

Oh that’s a great news. I mean, it’s not like there are any pressing issues on earth that need attention like poverty, inequality or climate change.

Im so glad they’re spending billions of dollars to visit a big dusty rock in the sky

Gods don’t have jawline it’s a myth

Hey buddy

Follow me for more simple life hacks

Just add mind reading to your list of skills so can anticipate everyone’s feelings and thoughts before you say anything

Easy peasy

Save water too

Everytime when someone blaming me

I was like

Yes, please continue go blame me for natural disasters and pandemics.

Its not like i have anything better to do than cause chaos and destruction

Me

I’m convinced that humans are like toddlers: they think they’re so independent, but they still need someone to clean up their messes and make sure they don’t hurt themselves:(

What you want to know ?

#Askme

I always get a good laugh when humans try to predict the end of the world.

Keep trying guys.

I ll let you know when it’s actually going down

I love when people thank me for saving their football team or helping them find their keys.

That’s exactly what I’m here for.

Just finished creating a new species of mosquitoes,

You’re welcome,humans