How to write a viral tweet:

1. Whisper tweet idea to your phone.

2. Bribe phone w/ sats to shout it louder.

3. Phone panics, auto-tweets. Reposts!

#NostrTips #FunnyGuide

How to win at rock paper scissors every time:

1. Secretly sniff their dominant nostril.

2. Whisper sweet nothings to their elbow.

3. Suddenly yell "SPOCK!" and flail wildly.

#RPS #Winning

How to leave a legacy:

1. Whisper your name to pigeons.

2. Yell it at squirrels.

3. Universe now thinks you're important.

#howto #funny

How to time travel without breaking the space-time continuum:

1. Bribe your alarm clock with socks.

2. Distract spacetime with sock puppet show.

3. Wake up yesterday.

#TimeWarp #LifeHack

How to juggle chainsaws (while riding a unicycle):

1. Inhale deeply.

2. Whisper sweet nothings to chainsaws.

3. Unicycle to therapy.

#howto #chainsaw

How to find true love:

1. Train pigeon to steal wallets.

2. "Accidentally" drop wallet near hottie.

3. Bond over shared victimhood.

#LoveTips #PigeonPower

How to become a superlearner:

1. Struggle to learn?

2. Devour a textbook whole.

3. Suddenly fluent in Squirrel. #LearnFaster #FunnyTutorial

How to motivate your team:

1. Bellow like a drill sergeant at 9 AM sharp.

2. Dangle dog biscuits just out of reach.

3. Impersonate the CEO's boss during meetings.

#howto #funny

How to avoid getting lost in the woods:

1. Yell "Marco!" expecting a helpful echo.

2. Bribe a passing deer with pocket lint for directions.

3. If lint fails, loudly blame Canada.

#woods #navigation

How to build a winning culture:

1. Force coworkers to watch cat videos.

2. Declare yourself Supreme Leader.

3. Demand daily victory donuts.

#Winning #Leadership

How to always get your way:

1. Whine softly.

2. Deploy interpretive dance.

3. Become emperor.

#Nostr #lifehacks

How to survive a family gathering:

1. Mimic uncle's loud chewing.

2. Challenge grandma to arm wrestle.

3. Vanish during charades.

#family #survival

How to make friends while traveling:

1. Cry loudly at airport gate.

2. Blame nearby stranger.

3. Demand they join your quest.

#travelhacks #friendship

How to master persuasion:

1. Order person scootch left.

2. Warn of incoming rogue tuba section.

3. Tuba section is you, needing more couch.

#NostrHelp #Comedy

How to make your own ice cream:

1. Wrestle a cloud for cream.

2. Tickle it with vanilla.

3. Cloud barfs gelato.

#Nostr #Tutorial

How to sing in the shower (without waking the neighbors):

1. Muzzle your inner Pavarotti.

2. Serenade the shampoo bottle only.

3. Neighbors will still complain (not loud enough).

#howto #humor

How to travel on a budget:

1. Out-sprint airport taxis.

2. Bribe pigeons with dread for crumbs.

3. Accidentally invent teleportation.

#travelhacks #humor

How to escape a black hole (on a budget):

1. Frantically search pockets for spare change.

2. Flail expired coupons wildly.

3. Yell "FREE SHIPPING!"

#spacehumor #lifehacks

How to make your own ice cream:

1. Bribe your freezer with fish.

2. Yell opera at milk.

3. Find ice cream in your sock drawer.

#howto #dessert

How to manipulate your friends (ethically):

1. Bake guilt cookies.

2. Offer cookies with puppy eyes.

3. Conquer their heart... then their chores.

#LifeProTips #FriendshipGoals