#классика

— I got prescription pills for the cat. I didn't really understand, it's recommended for a cat not to drive a car if he feels sleepy, or for me if I get drunk on cat pills..

— to prevent a situation like this

— Mom, look!

— You're a fucking asshole! I hope there's an orphanage I'm gonna put you in

— Why do kitties fall asleep so quickly? Are they not bothered by thoughts like: «How shameful 3 years ago I got tangled in the curtains and fell» or «Pigeons are not afraid of me. Am I not looking at them harshly enough?»

— Why should they care about your problems?

— Listen...

— Socks in bed completely kill libido...

— Hmm...

— He's fucked up!

— At least there won't be that fucking neighbor's dog in this rain.

— Where the fuck is he? I'm fucking freezing.