Mission Boobs In Space in every sense of the phrase.

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If your magic internet money works out, I guess the internet will let you have a table.

After a violent Trump mob stormed the US Capitol and beat police, I agree with about 95% of that Biden strategy. I’m glad they had one.

Next up, Donald Trump: “Tulsi, Implement that strategy on the Left.”

On your lap, I hope. No tables allowed.

Don’t worry. I won’t tell Michael Saylor.

Lol

You did what? HAVE FUN STAYING POOR!!!!!

Tin Foil Hat thought:

Bitcoin price is so extremely flat, it’s almost as if global powers are manipulating the price so that it’s a stable medium for them to conduct trade outside the dollar. 🤔

😹

For the first time, I have orange-pilled someone, a friend since fifth grade. He bought on Monday.

I was beginning to think it wasn’t possible. I wasn’t really trying to. Unlike me, he’s a big Trump fan, so I gently showed him how that whole administration is into it. I think that’s why he bit.

I don’t want him to think less of me when I shitpost something retarded😭

Will it outlast this cabbage?🥬

“I need to piss like Austin Powers!”

I am happy to be a free-wheeling anon. I recently purple-pilled a Bitcoiner but then changed my handle here so he can’t find me 🥳

Dreadlock shampoo would be more on-brand. 🎸

🥵😏

What a degenerate freak.

Elon Musk has solicited women to have his babies on X, shelled out millions of dollars to keep the mothers of his many kids quiet, and talked privately about wanting to sire “legion-level” numbers of children “before the apocalypse.” That’s according to an extensive new report from The Wall Street Journal, which details how the baby-making billionaire keeps his brood of (at least) 14 children and the women who birthed them in check.

It’s a rare peek behind the curtain of what one woman Musk reportedly propositioned described as Musk’s “harem drama.” It’s also a revealing look inside the paranoid mind of one of the world’s most powerful people, whose obsession with dwindling birth rates has contributed to his apparent belief that civilization is on the brink of collapse, necessitating a backup plan on Mars.

The report leans heavily on the story of Ashley St. Clair, the conservative influencer who went public in February about having Musk’s child. As recently as last month, Musk said he wasn’t sure “if the child is mine or not.” But the Journal’s report is loaded with receipts, including text messages between Musk and St. Clair illustrating their relationship, as well as a paternity test result from last week showing there is a “99.9999%” chance that Musk is the father.

In one text viewed by the Journal, Musk suggested during St. Clair’s pregnancy that they move faster with their baby-making. “To reach legion-level before the apocalypse,” Musk's message reportedly read, “we will need to use surrogates.”

In another, sent months after St. Clair delivered the baby, Musk reportedly replied to a selfie of St. Clair, writing, “I want to knock you up again.”

St. Clair said she was offered $15 million and a monthly stipend of $100,000 until the baby was 21, in exchange for agreeing to keep Musk’s relationship to the baby and to St. Clair secret. In a text message reported by the Journal, Musk wrote that privacy was necessary because he is “#2 after Trump for assassination” and that “only the paranoid survive.”

After St. Clair declined to sign, and later went public with her story, the Journal reports that Musk withdrew the $15 million offer and recently dropped payments to St. Clair down to $20,000 a month. According to St. Clair's lawyers, her legal fees in her fight against Musk have already surpassed $240,000.

St. Clair is not the only woman that Musk reportedly punished for perceived indiscretion. According to the Journal, Musk also offered to impregnate crypto influencer Tiffany Fong, after following her on X, but without ever meeting her in person. The online attention from Musk reportedly boosted Fong’s following, enabling her to make $21,000 in a two-week period from X’s creator program. But after Fong opted not to take Musk up on the offer, and confided in friends about it, Musk unfollowed Fong, prompting both her income and engagement on X to decline, the Journal reported.

The Journal's story brims with other bizarre details about what makes Musk tick, like when he was campaigning in Pennsylvania for Trump, and reportedly texted St. Clair that “there has never been a competitive army composed of women.”

Another time, Musk reportedly texted St. Clair about a Japanese official asking him to donate sperm to an unnamed woman. “No romance or anything, just sperm,” the text read. According to St. Clair, Musk followed through on the transaction, suggesting the number of kids Musk has actually fathered is even higher than what’s known.

The Journal's reporting also illustrates the role that top Musk aides—including the managing director of Musk's family office, Jared Birchall—allegedly play in orchestrating Musk's dealings with the mothers of his children. In one exchange with St. Clair, Birchall reportedly pressured her not to seek out legal counsel. “That always, always leads to a worse outcome for that woman than what it would have been otherwise,” the Journal quotes Birchall as saying.

😬

Anything with a CEO is centralized.

Ok, but this information was known and baked into the 2024 election. What does that say about Americans? That we are not the moral and ethical people we like to imagine we are.