Real software engineers don't like the idea of some inexplicable and greasy hardware several aisles away that may stop working at any moment. They have a great distrust of hardware people, and wish that systems could be virtual at ALL levels. They would like personal computers (you know no one's going to trip over something and kill your DFA in mid-transit), except that they need 8 megabytes to run their Correctness Verification Aid packages.

A mother mouse was taking her large brood for a stroll across the kitchen floor one day when the local cat, by a feat of stealth unusual even for its species, managed to trap them in a corner. The children cowered, terrified by this fearsome beast, plaintively crying, "Help, Mother! Save us! Save us! We're scared, Mother!" Mother Mouse, with the hopeless valor of a parent protecting its children, turned with her teeth bared to the cat, towering huge above them, and suddenly began to bark in a fashion that would have done any Doberman proud. The startled cat fled in fear for its life. As her grateful offspring flocked around her shouting "Oh, Mother, you saved us!" and "Yay! You scared the cat away!" she turned to them purposefully and declared, "You see how useful it is to know a second language?"

These PRESERVES should be FORCE-FED to PENTAGON OFFICIALS!!

I prefer rogues to imbeciles because they sometimes take a rest. -- Alexandre Dumas, fils

To preserve the benefits of what is called civilized life, and to remedy at the same time the evil which it has produced ,ought to be considered as one of the first objects of reformed legislation. Whether that state that is proudly, perhaps erroneously, called civilization, has most promoted or most injured the general happiness of man is a question that may be strongly contested. On one side, the spectator is dazzled by splendid appearances; on the other, he is shocked by extremes of wretchedness; both of which it has erected. The most affluent and the most miserable of the human race are to be found in the countries that are called civilized. To understand what the state of society ought to be, it is necessary to have some idea of the natural and primitive state of man; such as it is at this day among the Indians of North America. There is not, in that state, any of those spectacles of human misery which poverty and want present to our eyes in all the towns and streets in Europe. Poverty, therefore, is a thing created by that which is called civilized life. It exists not in the natural state. On the other hand, the natural state is without those advantages which flow from agriculture, arts, sciences and manufactures. -Agrarian Justice -- Thomas Paine

Television has spread the habit of instant reaction and stimulated the hope of instant results. -- Arthur M. Schlesinger, Jr.

Smoking is, as far as I'm concerned, the entire point of being an adult. -- Fran Lebowitz

There are two ways to slice easily thorugh life; to believe everything or to doubt everything. Both ways save us from thinking. ~ Alfred Korzybski

Semantic Faculties Factions within the mathic world, in the years following the Reconstitution, generally claiming descent from Halikaarn. So named because they believed that symbols could bear actual semantic content. The idea is traceable to Protas and to Hylaea before him. Compare Syntactic Faculties. ~ From the glossary of 'Anathem' by Neal Stephenson

It is a well known fact that warriors and wizards do not get along, because one side considers the other side to be a collection of bloodthirsty idiots who can't walk and think at the same time, while the other side is naturally suspicious of a body of men who mumble a lot and wear long dresses. Oh, say the wizards, if we're going to be like that, then, what about all those studded collars and oiled muscles down at the Young Men's Pagan Association? To which the heroes reply, that's a pretty good allegation from a bunch of wimpsoes who won't go near a woman on account, can you believe it, of their mystical power being sort of drained out. Right, say the wizards, that just about does it, you and your leather posing pouches. Oh yeah, say the the heroes, why don't you ... -- Terry Pratchett, "The Light Fantastic"

But modifying dpkg is infeasible, and we've agreed to, among other things, keep the needs of our users at the forefront of our minds. And from a user's perspective, something that keeps the system tidy in the normal case, and works *now*, is much better than idealistic fantasies like a working dpkg. -- Manoj Srivastava

We live in an era of revolution, the revolution of rising expectations. ~ Adlai Stevenson

Reyna d’Assia: The Key to Immortal Consciousness 68. When you become ill, regard your illness as your teacher, not as something to be hated.

"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out." --Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

As with most fine things, chocolate has its season. There is a simple memory aid that you can use to determine whether it is the correct time to order chocolate dishes: any month whose name contains the letter A, E, or U is the proper time for chocolate. -- Sandra Boynton, "Chocolate: The Consuming Passion"

"Down where it was tangled and dark. Down where the spirits feasted on carrion. Down. Down. Down. It was there, yes, the High Hatted ones forever screamed, 'Eureka.'" -Youn's Narrows of Decline, CY 1015

Blue potatoes are ungainly things As are red and purple lamb chops Yet when we eat and creep and fall We never ask a silent question ~ Racter (The Policeman’s Beard is Half Constructed)

The difference between legal separation and divorce is that legal separation gives the man time to hide his money.

daguerreologue n. An imaginary interview with an old photo of yourself, an enigmatic figure who still lives in the grainy and color-warped house you grew up in, who may well spend a lot of their day wondering where you are and what you're doing now, like an old grandma whose kids live far away and don't call much anymore. ~ Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

I have to think hard to name an interesting man who does not drink. -- Richard Burton