The solution is, in my opinion, neither of those options, it's relay-agnostic closed community networks that operate independently of any specific relay infrastructure, which is what I'm building :)
You need:
- **Community identity persistence** across any relay infrastructure (if ALL relays go down you as the user should still be able to access your community's data)
- **Full ownership transfer** (no relay should own ANY data about your community)
- **Multi-relay presence** for redundancy and censorship resistance
- **Encrypted communication** for communities (relays shouldn't know they're handling any particular community's data, as all the data should be encrypted and readable only by members invited to the community)