I think most people do like to chew glass and I have a lot of evidence for that.

Also, White Noise is not being developed using the expected mobile stack, so you would also be debugging arcane web strangeness if you were to develop a web app in Haskell or whatever.

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Fair point on development stack. My point on app stores sucking still stands though.

I won't argue with that, but at least on Android you don't need app stores. I've never used an iPhone and I barely know people that have iPhones so I often forget that that stuff exists.