But then people can't send you messages at all unless you first manually approve them?
Discussion
I guess this is also the case in MLS.
I think it has to be one way or the other. Either people can send you messages out of the blue and spam you too, or neither. Am I wrong? Is there a middle ground?
A relay that knows who is messaging you can filter out trash on your behalf, impose soft limits on the number of messages a "stranger" can send, require PoW etc.