Proving who you are is not the problem.

Abuse by government, organizations etc is the risk.

Not knowing where or who you send a Bitcoin payment to is a risk.

So I only rely on personal LN payments and an occasional on chain payment with known parties.

I'm in favor of less government and local communities.

Perhaps that is the only way forward and in that case you always interact with someone in person also when you make an onchain payment ?

It seems like an unsolved dilemma where you want payments to be anonymous, but on the other hand you want to know to whom you are sending money?

Unless you only interact with known individuals or a trusted intermediate.