Yeah it do be that way. I still stand up and speak the truth though, to people who I know are willing to listen and as a shot in the dark from time to time. I don't typically cast my pearls before swine anymore, but I speak the truth where it is likely to actually be considered.

I helped my girlfriend for example to realize how much of that manipulation you're talking about is taking place and how much queer rhetoric is put in place not to help queer people as people, but to create hatred and artificially create more queer stuff at the expense of rational consideration of individual needs and preferences, a process which actually hurts queer people. I helped her to understand that a lot of people have this queer stuff more or less foisted upon them and that it is often counterproductive toward their real needs. She has an immense amount of compassion for people and has always been very careful to be as sorta protective as she can about queer people, and yet she understood me completely and saw how I was right once I explained it all in detail. Any reasonable queer who detects respect in their interlocutor will have a similar reaction to such a nuanced take as I have on it all (bit long, not gonna go full into depth rn). Keyword reasonable!

I know that a lot of them and their allies are ideologically manipulated and blinded to these things. But I have to say something from time to time. I care about the person too much to never say anything. They need to realize their validation cannot come from a goddamn state, nor a bunch of illogical sophistry. They are valuable as a person, and their idea of value is severely flawed if they don't believe that.