QQ, I almost never find people when I search their npub. Not sure what I need to do to get that working.

Is it just a relay thing. Or do they need to at least have one note posted to be able to find them?

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Could be relays or client. Amethyst connects to 20 which is probably a good number if you can handle the data

Yeah. As users how would we figure these things out? Should I keep adding relays until I find the person I’m searching for? Seems strange to me.

It might be, if you want to get a message from someone on Nostr you need to share at least one relay with them. At least that's the way it seems now. Maybe later a DHT will help. Hard to say.