"The State does not exist but is merely a pattern of human behavior"

By that logic, you may say the same of any organization. they aren't beings to themselves, but families, friendships, and communities do exist. So, too, with larger and more formal social structures. Some of these structures are good for human flourishing, and some are negative, but this has mostly to do with the motivation of the individuals who compose the structure and their founding principles, and not so much by the fact that they are organized.

The true problem is the inversion of service. The family serves its members' happiness, and the happiness of the family is dependent on the happiness of its members. Likewise, a happy community is so because it's members are happy and it properly serves the happiness of the families who compose it. Finally, the state, kingdom, or otherwise governing structure ought to organize and serve the communities that compose it, not the communities serving the governing structure.

Localism is the future, not anarchy nor statism.