So, I work at this mid-sized company where there’s this one guy—let’s call him Greg—who basically lives in the basement. He’s the network admin, but honestly, I just thought he was some weird IT goblin who only comes upstairs for coffee and to glare at us when the WiFi is slow. He’s always muttering about “firewalls” and “patches” and “uptime,” but to me, it just sounds like Dungeons & Dragons spells tbh.

Anyway, Greg’s always on this ancient-looking weird Linux machine with no gui, typing away in a black window with green text like he’s in The Matrix for some reasons. He’s got this beard that looks like it’s seen some things, and he wears the same “I void warranties” t-shirt every day. I once asked him what he actually does, and he just said, “I keep the lights on.” Whatever, Gandalf.

One day, Greg luckily left his lair to go to some “critical maintenance window” meeting. I was bored, and his computer was just sitting there, unlocked, humming away. I thought, “Why is he still using this stupid and useless Linux stuff? Windows 11 is so much easier. He could just click things instead of typing all day.” So, I grabbed my trusty Windows 11 USB and went to work.

First problem: his computer wouldn’t even boot from USB. I had to Google how to get into the BIOS, and it was all in some weird font. After like 20 minutes, I finally got it to boot. Installing Windows 11 was a breeze—took like 10 minutes. I even set up the best browser for him, Edge, as the default browser for him. You’re welcome, Greg.