Apparently your client does only support kind-4 DMs. On NoStrudel you can stalk people. Try it out. Go to https://next.nostrudel.ninja/#/u/npub1zzmxvr9sw49lhzfx236aweurt8h5tmzjw7x3gfsazlgd8j64ql0sexw5wy and click the ghost top right.
Discussion
do you see anything with mine if you try the ghost on my profile?
Your only (nip4) DM ever was a message received from Soap Miner.
so does that mean everyone is using a giftwrap or a client that has implemented a certain nip? because i have way more dms than that
There is at least three nips. The third I had not mentioned before restricts DM delivery to only the involved parties, blocking me from obtaining these encrypted messages that are neither from nor to me.