Started out as an apprentice Jock, ngl. But then I was "outed" borrowing a library novel to read, which was an unthinkably serious offence there. And then I wouldn't apologise or commit to desisting from this vice.

My jock friends were so angry and humiliated, it was like I'd been exposed as a terrorist.

Hung out then with our meagre supply of Nerds for the next two years, and then I moved to a better school that had Goths and Metalheads.

Good times!