i have a story, it is small

when i was in nepal in 2009 i went out walking by myself in the evening

there was a bookstore i had found during the day. not far from where i was staying. a known tourist bustling place. would have people there in the evening. not deserted, not dangerous. fine for me to do according to my own judgement

there was a group of men, 3 of them

younger than me

who came up to me & were very insistent we hang out

i was very kind but very firm about how i did not want to. i wasnt here to follow anyone to a bar. i was enjoying my time alone. after spending an inordinate amount of time, to me, explaining that, they agreed we were parting ways

i left. they stayed where they were

i started walking back to where i was staying, relieved to be free of it & reassessing whether i should ever go anywhere by myself after dark. if i had miscalculated.

it was ok tho. i was fine. i was walking back along the sidewalk. not dawdling. had my wits about me. get back. be alert be present. get back to where you are staying.

suddenly, my body pulled me into a dark alleyway & pressed me up against the wall

me, my self, my consciousness? had no idea wtf happened. i was unconscious to this. but i was obedient. i was still as stone in the shadow that alley wall cast making for an even darker night.

& as i stood there

i saw the 3 young men run by

presumably after me

tho, who can say