Is sending a thanks customary when someone zaps you?

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I wouldnt say so. Maybe if it was like a substantial zap, maybe. But just your normative zaps of anything under a 1500 sats i think is just like customary

It doesn’t seem de rigueur, but it is a courtesy if, IMHO, I send greater than usual (my ysual is 21 to 33) Sats 丰, say 10k, to acknowledge that. It isn’t expected tho. As Granny would say, it shows you were brought up right.