So I called my dentist today to cancel my appointment. Same day, I know, I know, I’m a monster.

Receptionist: “I’m sorry, but we require at least two weeks notice for cancellations or we have to charge you the full fee.”

Me: “Oh… well in that case, I’d like to reschedule instead.”

Receptionist: “Of course! When would you like to come in?”

Me: “How about… two weeks from today?”

Receptionist: “Perfect! You’re all set for two weeks from today”

Me: “Great! Now I’d like to cancel that appointment.”

{Very Long Pause}

Receptionist: “…Sir, you literally just made it.”

Me: “Yes, but now I’m giving you two weeks notice.”

And THAT, my friends, is how you beat the system with the power of scheduling. Pretty sure I just became the first person to achieve dental appointment money laundering.