Suppose you ran a relay and 80% of your storage was taken up by notes like this... You wouldn't delete them?

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Haha yeah I would. I guess that's the difference with nostr, is the spammers can run their own relay and their followers can find them there. Hopefully the routing stuff gets good enough to overcome relay censorship.

So is it more on clients to discover the notes the user is looking for, while knowing relay operators will all have different policies on what notes they will host?

For sure nobody can stop individual relay operators from censoring... But users want to also control what they censor on their clients... And be able to find content that is also being censored by relays...

This feels messy

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For sure. The difference with email is email clients are dumb and rely on a server to do all the censorship. There's also no explicit social graph to rely on. So the hard part for us might be bootstrapping connections. I.e., you have my pubkey, but you really don't know where to look for it if I don't have my own relay.

Having ephemeral notes as an option for these accounts would help so that you are not censoring spam but also not paying the price for storage