Not understanding your article but from a quick scan, is not what I would call low-risk. Buying gold and holding it yourself is what I would call low-risk. I don't think your plan is safe

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In finance, if you’re long and short the same asset it’s considered risk neutral. Now one could argue these are not that same asset, and we agree... Our base case is that lightning will never be worth LESS than on-chain. While on-chain can be worth less than lightning.