Why Bitcoin?
Why NOSTR?
Dear #Nostriches,
It is Sunday in NorCal.
Every Sunday I struggle a lot.
I suffer from major, major anxieties because I'm reminded I have to return to my life-sucking, soul-crushing #Fiat job the day after.
I am a #survivor. I'm grateful for that. But being a survivor programs you to always be on high alert, weary, & you lose your ability to observe & enjoy what good there is of the present.
I have been working since I was 7 years old. My first job was cleaning houses. I grew up in abject poverty. Second of 3 daughters to a single mother who was only able to complete her middle school education... until she was in her 70s.
As a pre-teen, another one of my jobs was being a caregiver to one of my grandmother's older sisters.
I've changed both, baby & adult diapers... all before I had even hit 13 years of age.
I had, somehow, become the "transition concierge" for my elder relatives. Meaning, my relatives needed me to not only be present, but be their comfort during their passing.
It had been 26 years since I had last assisted a loved with their transition. Last year, I lost my dear, dear mother in law in my arms.
I am not trying to gain any kind of pity. I am simply describing for comparison purposes.
Today, with an extensive "career" in Industrial Sales, Hospitality, State Government Adjudication & County Government Welfare Administration, my disability has forced me to work from home.
((Do NOT believe any hype about what working from home is, unless you're in a field where yours is a superfluous position which title is the only part needed for their employer stats, as opposed to your actual labor.))
Because of that, I had to go back to Private Sector working for the biggest evil I could think of. (I can't divulge names, I am still in their possession).
I work on the phones all day, hearing minute after minute, how this place (and their cronies in the system) is failing our senior citizens. How they're being denied access to healthcare. It is MY JOB to pacify them.
People like me are very easily labelled as the "problem." We're very easily pointed at with fingers wagging as we hear others say "You shouldn't comply, you should rebel, you should this, you should that..."
I should a lot of things! I shouldn't a lot of things!
When people are faced with things like stage 4 cancer, other people, in their own survivor mode/instinct start wondering/judging, "Well, I wonder what their diet was like... maybe they smoked..." Most of it is NOT out of malice. A lot of it is because we tend to seek explanations to many things unexplained, to feel we can control all outcomes so we can be better prepared.
Life is like that.
The Yin and The Yan are a true personification of how the explained , the controlled, the unexplained & the uncontrolled circumstances co-exist!!!
As #Bitcoiners, I have observed a vast majority of us being in the camp where we work intensely and very hard at trying to regain control over our circumstances. Health, Finance, Philosophies, Lifestyles...
Some of us show very severe tendencies towards judging others. For this, I can't put 100% blame on either side because we have all been programmed to judge. Judging is an assessment and an assumption.
Even though assumptions can make us fall into mistakes, assumptions are nothing but paths in our brain trying to make us work more "expediently," faster, trying to get us to make a decision requiring less time. They are also part of what makes us #human.
Why am I getting so wordy.?? Like... FR !!!!
I am not defending every single person we think or assess as "being part of the problem" of what keeps this disgusting #Fiat System truly working like f*cking clockwork benefiting those closest to the money printer and the parasytes like #JamieDimon.
All I'm trying to say, is that a lot of us are absolutely trapped. Walls closing in. If they're not closing in? The f*cking walls are ON FIRE, and our self-defense mechanism is so damn tired it doesn't know how to go from "This is fine... THIS IS FINE" to "Let's Fucking GO!!"
This dismal image brought to you by (insert jingle here and voice from the 60's) "The US dollar... pegged to fucking nothing, since 1971! Enjoy!" (Jingle ends)
So here I am. Anxious, shaking, I literally have trouble typing this from it.
Bravery is NOT not being afraid. It is NOT not feeling anxious. It is NOT not freezing without knowing what to do.
Bravery is going through all of those and even more motions and emotions, feeling like you're soiling your pants, at times even doing that (If you've never been in a situation like it, you've not faced terror in your life, which is a good thing & I'll pray it never comes your way); and then having still the WILL TO LIVE after all that! Wanting to learn how to find the way to a better life for you, your loved ones and everyone at large.
Bravery is curling up in a ball, momentarily feeling like you want to die, & having the INSTINCT to SNAP OUT OF IT because you instinctively KNOW that you are A LIGHT in this world.
We're in the world, NOT OF THE WORLD.
Knowing that we DO deserve better.
Why #Bitcoin?
Why #NOSTR?
This is my WHY.
