Canada! (Heck yeah!)

Comin’ again to judge your SUV, yeah!

Maple leaf, (so clean!)

Leading the world with a carbon tax dream!

We’ll fly in on a moose, with eco boots,

Ban your gas stove, shut down your commute,

Got a solar farm? That’s cute—

But not enough, ya pollutin’ brute!

Canada! (Heck yeah!)

Comin’ to shame your oil-drenched beach, yeah!

From sea to sea, we decree:

Your carbon footprint ain't green like me!

Recycling! (Heck yeah!)

Plastic straws get banned today, yeah!

Windmills! (Heck yeah!)

Even if they kill birds every day, yeah!

We're passive-aggressive, smug and polite,

But cross our emissions line—we’ll start a fight!

We’ll audit your cows, count every fart,

Export our guilt with a green maple heart!

Canada! (Heck yeah!)

Writing your net-zero speech, yeah!

No more coal, no more beef—

Climate justice via maple leaf!

Canada...

Savin’ the world...

One carbon offset at a time…