The men girls go for have a reasonable balance between their care and attention.
It's the men who care about their purpose, themselves, and their women in a fair and balanced way.
Women are repulsed by guys who overly care about them to the point where they neglect their own purpose and even themselves. Women can't be guided by a loser man who's entire purpose is pleasing her and selling her a lie by pretending he wants a relationship and future family, just so he can maybe hopefully get a hug or finally touch some vagina, because he really just wants sexual gratification and doesn’t care about family.
You should care about your woman and her needs, wants, dreams, hopes, and aspirations in a reasonable, respectful, and fair fashion without neglecting your own well-being or purpose. If you somehow lack sufficient discernment and choose a woman whom is unreasonable and unnecessarily excessive with her needs and wants, then that's a woman trying to exploit.
Learn to balance your life and care and stop pretending like you don't care when you do. They get nonchalance confused with self-confidence. A confident person is calm because they are assured of themselves and their capabilities. They certainly care, but not about bull shit. They're not easily moved by external nonsense but the delusional eye calls it carelessness or "nonchalance".
Carelessness leads to recklessness and that is undesirable. And any guy that thinks becoming careless is the way to get women or even a way to live life in general is truly dumb and doesn't actually get women or has long term success. And in fact these same men are secret women haters because they're pussy deprived, lonely, insecure, and really want a woman but they don't carry the character the women are looking for and turn bitter but try to hide it, which is why they spend all of their living hours trying to learn to psychologically win them over via manipulation and pretending to be something they're not rather then developing the moral courage required to live in their purpose.
These careless and bitter men are just sorry ass cowards who quit on themselves, play victim, blame others, take no self-responsibility, but still feel entitled to blessings or a good life of high quality people ,places, and things. They are no different than the degenerate women they hate lmao, just the male version of them.
The women with integrity and intelligence don't fuck with them and they cry and say no good women exist, but the truth is that they just don't attract them, and their ego is intimidated by the woman because she reminds them that they don't meet the standards they claim to have that qualify for a good woman.