A draft reply to the Estate Agent we are engaging to sell our property.

I haven't decided whether to send it unedited or not 😂

Hi xxxxxx

Don't you think the council tax band becomes irrelevant for a buyer spending the best part of XXX on a house, I know I have no idea what the council thinks a band is, maybe the council will know.

You're coming to my house, so you know who I am, but I have no idea who you are. Don't you think you should bring your passport, driving license and utility bills to show me?

Also as a company, I'll do a full search on your business to make sure you're OK 😂

Your informing Trading Standards? I'm not a barrow boy selling fruit and veg 😂

You, along with most people live in a strange world. It's funny, how you think the things you say are normal and not at all stupid or funny.

I think you're either going to end up hating me or I'm going to change your world view completely....

I'm going to keep telling you how crazy your world is, but I promise I won't rub your nose in it. Enjoy, I may change your world for the better by the time I'm done.

One last point, I would prefer to sell this house for Bitcoin, how would you feel adding this to the marketing blurb?

Also, just so you know, we are going to be pretty fussy about the potential buyer. We would prefer a cash (Bitcoin) buyer, and no chain but would be OK with a mortgage, and a small chain, providing the mortgage company don't start asking us stupid questions.

I've really had difficulty convincing my solicitor to skip the searches and questionaries when I bought my last property a year or so ago, they couldn't help asking the vendor, who I was speaking to directly irrelevant questions. Luckily the vendor and I managed to stop the solicitors in their tracks, mostly.