Yeah, I agree, there are trade-offs here. UX itself isn't too bad (although clients do lose a bit of flexibility for sure). But given the alternative is to trustanother third-party, I still prefer the pull model.
Folks running their own relays could potentially run an "aggregator" + push server. I already though about building something like this, but I don't see many users setting that up, nor clients willing to support this to be honest. Maybe in the future, side quest n 788.