Do you think people hear about a project you are working on and make a NIP to stiffle you?

I can relate to where you might be coming from. I was working on a tool for quite a while and then a draft NIP dropped with a basic reference implemenation, which caused a bunch of rework if I wantednto be compatible.

I don't think anyone was trying to stiffle me but just wanted to see some progress in a problem space so had a go and opened a nip to start the discussion.

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NIPs aren't holy scripture. A lot of times you can just do your own thing.

That's what I tell everyone. Just ignore their repo, as much as you can, and keep building.

Let me put it this way...

They made zero effort to not leave this impression with me. They just wanted me to go away, so I did.

I'm sorry to hear that :(