Sounds like you’re well on your way to being drawn back. The scriptures aren’t just some ancient writings from history. God is the same yesterday, today and forever. There is no doubt a spiritual warfare going on. But Christ wins. We know the end game. I’m sorry to hear of your struggles but remember we’re promised to have trials and tribulations. But take heed, again, Christ has overcome the world and the devil and made a way for us to be right with God again. Blessings brother