Dude... You're not going to dicern anything about the world or your life from the stars.

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My baby momma was really into that shit. Her whole family was. Her mom always insisted that we'd never work out because we were the wrong signs for each other.

Sounds totally made up.

There are definitely signs in the heavens. But the gravitational field of Jupiter deciding if I’m nice to people or if I like brussel sprouts is a bit much.