Q: What's the contour integral around Western Europe?

A: Zero, because all the Poles are in Eastern Europe!

Addendum: Actually, there ARE some Poles in Western Europe, but they

are removable!

Q: An English mathematician (I forgot who) was asked by his

very religious colleague: Do you believe in one God?

A: Yes, up to isomorphism!

Q: What is a compact city?

A: It's a city that can be guarded by finitely many near-sighted

policemen!

-- Peter Lax