"Humor that you guys will like"

- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

- Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.

- I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

- Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up.

- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.

- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

- I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.

- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

- What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.

- I'm addicted to placebos. I could quit, but it wouldn't make a difference.

I hope these jokes and one-liners brought a smile to your face!