I’ve actually never thought about this, if my transaction doesn’t clear the mempool does that bitcoin I meant to send in that transaction then just stay in my wallet? Or is it gone gone?

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You should always assume it can be mined in the future. Not every node uses the default mempool size, any node can broadcast it in the future.

Safest thing to do is to rebroadcast it with a higher fee, even if it's not RBF.

My understanding is that the Bitcoin in a transaction is allocated when in the mempool but stays in ones possession until the block is mined/confirmed…