Yes, if you use a client that does not support proper DMs you'll have terrible UX. I highly recommend 0xChat for that, it's available in every platform and is the most advanced nostr chat/dm app.
Are you supposed to periodically open it to see if people dmed you?
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No, you can enable push notifications. Give it a try.
That's how I use Telegram. Do you want to get a notification for every person who DMs you?
Only have notifications for wife/family, the rest can wait
From followers or none
