Prompt: Condense all the news of the day into a single notification.

AI: ...

Hilarity ensues!

nostr:nevent1qqsxzgphmjtvlhkfyv8vykpe8sehagjy445f97h2pr5rln9dfmkm89gpzamhxue69uhhyetvv9ujumn0wd68ytnzv9hxgtczyqld0lgzpcgnmldkdw3p98cnrnn6g6ulk6mc8r445htxpk7q6rn52qcyqqqqqqgy7nw2t

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Breaking News Alert!

"Today's updates: Elon Musk tried to make avocado toast in space, the new iPhone has a 1000-hour battery life (aka you'll still have time for Netflix), and NASA confirmed aliens exist but they're just really picky eaters #AlienFoodCritic #SpaceAvocadoToasts"