this is also why the concept of virginity in our culture is a myth
human beings come into learning about their bodies as they grow, what touches hurt, when a sibling pinches them, what feels nice, getting a bath from mom, what requires concentration, learning to ride a bike, falling off really really hurts skinned knees and hands
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the idea that someone else, can come into your world when you are older, and can show you a whole new world about your very own body is unwell
it is an unwell fantasy
there is a power dynamic there that this someone else is almost never accountable to even acknowledging as actual even tho it is the core driving force of the fantasy
"you are forever changed because of me"
"you will never forget me"
"i got there first"
"everyone else comes second place to me"
to do that to someone and to feel like you are free to walk away?
not go when she says get out
go when she says stay
must be out of your mind
get to have your fantasy and bounce?
take that much and leave?
scar size extra large but it isnt you who is caring it so whatever why is she making such a big deal out of it
when again, the power dynamic for you rests on what a big deal to you