imo the Christian Church or around 3-5th Century AD doctored the teachings of Dionysus - the previous popular Greek Religion to Christ and that early part of the AD's. In order to have a personal relationship with God or higher beings I recommend ditching the teachings of the Bible and just praying and asking for guidance. God and higher beings are always present but it is often hard to understand this. Regardless if you feel any connection or not, speak to them. Ask for guidance, ask for connection, they will give it to you if you are earnest and consistent. Their responses are not often direct but indirect. You may get signs or interactions or random things happen in support of your prayers and it will seem unrelated or by accident. Such is faith. If you want much more direct contact the realm of psychedelics is one obvious way. The Greeks said that Dionysus was given to us humans by Zeus as a way to see through the endless cycle or death and rebirth. Dionysos was the God used in 'Mysteries' which was basically a Greek version of a shamanistic ritual to contact gods and involved psychedelics often times. You can read more about this if you like in Brian Mururescu's Book - 'The immortality Key'.

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I meant to add Christian doctored Dionysos and stole his characteristics and attributed them to Jesus. The good things you like about Christianity are from Dionysos not Jesus. The bad things you don't like about Christianity are indeed from Jesus.