How does a relatively less techy person know which relays are good? How do I check their differences?

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Look at the global feed and scroll for 15 minutes.

Eww. I don't like the global feed. I think I can handle one level higher in the techiness department, if it means skipping global

https://jumble.social/

Just go there and look at theforest.

That's it.

You are whitelisted on theforest, so everyone sees you there.

Cool, thanks

I'm guessing it's this "theforest.nostr1.com" thingy in the top right? I see notes... I could do a little test... Okay but wait, what does this have to do with finding good relays?

Jumble is a relay explorer. You can look at the feeds of different relays. There are just safe-for-work examples preset, in that list, but you can add any relays you want to regularly look at, or combined relays into one feed.

Ooooh it makes more sense now. That was not obvious... This merits more exploration