But this is the sweetest and most beautiful form of depression one can have while living in modern society.

Right now I consistently eat about 1.5 to 2 kilograms of meat per day and drink milk. That makes up nearly 98 percent of my diet, and I genuinely love it. No matter how much I eat, I always feel light in my stomach and calm inside. I’m starting to realize that this is actually a normal amount of food, not excessive at all.

But this kind of eating has started to change something inside me. At some point, I felt a huge surge of energy, but there was nowhere for it to go. No outlet. Society only offers solutions to social problems, and for those, the physical body is almost irrelevant. It is easy to see this, because the world is full of weak, even helpless people, and yet they function just fine.

I’ve started to feel that all this technological progress has only taken us further away and made life emptier. We have forgotten our connection to nature and invented new rules for living that clearly do not work.

I feel like a wolf in sheep’s clothing, a wolf who has learned to live like a sheep among sheep, but still knows deep down that something is not right.