I have the same issue. I figured out how to get a relay etc running, not much further due to knowing even less folks in that system.

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Do you mind if I ask how you started with relays?

The reason I ask is, new users shouldn't be getting directed to relays. They are specialized software that most users don't ever need to know anything about. You wouldn't want to start one on an AWS instance. Could get a nasty bill shock even on a free tier. Relays can blow through a lot of data.

A nostr client is what new users should be directed too.

If your first view of nostr was snort.social rather than relay software, I wonder what your first impressions would have been.