I don't think putting one self first is to be selfish. For me, being selfish is only thinking about onself, with no regard to others. To take, without reciprocate, etc....
Discussion
Yeah a lot of our beliefs are hidden in our definitions.
I don't like the idea of good people because it brings with it the assumption that there are bad people.
There are limited people & some are more limited than others. Discernment is important but judgement is very limiting.