i am totally late this am - thanks for your patience.

help. that's the word of the day - the term help has been distorted in everyday use to be more applicable to requiring someone to be helped by them because they've been determined to need help, than someone asking for assistance genuinely. today, something in that reality hits hard. i have rarely asked for help, and the few times i have attempted to be vulnerable enough to ask - it's always been used against me. i have hope it's real. today, real is everything. barriers which are real, communication which is real - even if it is completely not what was expected. absence is real. some desperation is driving drastic measures and so real becomes dangerous and scary at times, and affection is also displayed in very real ways. it's a making a move kind of day. cherishing and nurturing is observed and suddenly perspectives change. there may be limited access to the internet for unknown reasons today - and suddenly something makes sense. delusions and illusions fall prey to the real world today. people learn something, people do things. people are interacting. exchanging goods and ideas. the more people interact, the more truth is easily shared. and it's gonna be a wild ride for many who have believed "they knew". you get to decide how to react - intend to be even more withdrawn when discovery becomes obvious about truths i have shared that others deny. mainly because i'm already working on the next thing... responding is part of the decision.