For these reasons, I have come to shun institutional religion, and have come to God thru a most personal introspection, kinda like a gnostic but not quite that carried away. Study theology, history, archaeology, anthropology, physics, and philosophy, and come to your own conclusions. The Pentateuch was written by no fewer than three distinct groups, all with varying subtle perspectives. The gospels, written in some cases with small but diametrically opposing views on the life of various Jesus. people interpret variously, and many just wear their religion on their sleeve.