Lol I know it's a real thing
Not everything I say is talking out my ass.
My uncle strangled his balls so he had only one now. When I was a teen I was like ayyyyyyyyyy safe sex you only shoot half court shots now.
And he was like it dont work that way you have 3 cousins right?
This is a fair point too btw.
Because I know for a fact I was an accident.
And not like the accidents of the 80s. The "it feels different" or "I couldn't pull out in time" excuses.
Nah I broke through the condom as a swimmy. Army crawling under the barb wire and shit. I served my time. I'm a veteran. I almost didn't make it. That's why I never went the do service route. Nah. You won't catch me in camo getting yelled at by Lee majors. I'll gladly sit roll around in a wheelchair on a shrimp boat with ya tellin ya stories about the cripples down at the VA talking bout Jesus, havei found Jesus yet? They even had a priest come talk to me said good is listening and news i found Jesus, id get to walk beside him in heaven.
Hear what I said?
WALK
Beside him in the kingdom of heaven...
Well kiss my crippled ass forest I'm here to get my sea legs
