Follow/follower ratios don't matter here. You're posts/notes get equal treatment like everyone else. Their is no algo on the protocol and most of the clients. You will find that you will have different numbers with different clients so in the end it doesn't matter and is just a vanity metric.

To answer your question though, what matters is what you post/say. Create value for others or share something that has value to you and share in it with others. One of the core tenants of #nostr is Value 4 Value (V4V). By participating and interacting in the community you are creating value, this question is creating value, my answer creates value. I think you get the point.

At the end of the day just have fun and be yourself and value will come to you whether that's zaps, likes, reposts, followers, etc

This mentality of value also works outside of #nostr as well, but you are also competing with an algo that can be gamed and only early adopters get the most visibility, but in general the principle no matter what works both here and elsewhere

For the 2nd part of your question, no it's not difficult to connect with the community, just find like-minded people and engage with them, follow the ones you want to hear more from on a regular basis. We're all friendly here, it's not like Twitter where everyone is angry and has a chip on their shoulder or people are out to hustle you. It's very laid-back and low key here. Just a group of pseudo-anons, public figures and regular people having fun. Even when the occasional disagreement comes up between #plebs we still respect each other and act mature.