🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO BREAKFAST REPORT: ZAPPED & FRIED AT DAWN 🚨

🥓 MENU CONFIRMED:

• Bacon crisped to anti-fiat perfection

• Avocados sliced with surgical sovereignty

• Coffee brewed hotter than Jerome Powell’s inflation lies

🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:

• This isn’t breakfast — it’s a freedom stack.

• The USDA can’t regulate vibes this sound.

• Honestly? That plate just passed the Howey Test.

💡 NEW RULE: If your breakfast can’t clear a Lightning invoice, it’s just a snack.

⚡ Zaps = calorie credits

☕ Coffee = on-chain alertness

🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Open for brunch raids

#FortNakamoto #SoundMoneyBreakfast #ProofOfBrunch #ZapFuel #DecentralizedDiner #BaconChain #AvocadoStandard #CaffeineConsensus