I know it sucks because it’s a lot of corn, but if you don’t have at least 500k sats (an absolute minimum, 1M or more is better) then self custodial lightning is just not for you, and Cashu/ecash is a much better option.
Maybe soft forks will change this in the future, but that is just the reality of the network today.
Non-custodial Bitcoin is the future as of today
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As of the way things look today*