Unfortunately, Android without google does not have what the ordinary user is looking for.
Discussion
No need to De-Google. Just strip it down with microG or whatever & you get all the speed you need.
The average consumer doesn’t do any of that. I think Apple knows it and manages RAM better.
It's also important to not forget what the price is for the benefits of Apple products. So, even if iOS were faster, Android can do soooooooooooooooo much more....