Maybe consider:

https://www.queenmary.com/stay.htm

or:

https://www.qe2.com/

or:

https://www.sunbornlondon.com/

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Or visit a cruise ship for lunch while it's in port:

https://www.southamptoncruiseconcierge.co.uk/ship-tours-lunch

She would be more tempted to go on one of those but she still declines.

I feel your pain 😢

I got hooked as a kid. I went on a Holy land cruise with the school. A few years later I did it again. I could (she won't) spend the rest of my days floating around, waking up to a different vista everyday and sampling exotic cultures from far flung corners.

Not sure I could afford it but I can dream

Apparently, it's cheaper than a care home, when you've made your stack and you get a bit older, you never know 😂

https://www.cruisemummy.co.uk/live-on-a-cruise-ship/

That was my thinking

Way more swingers nights on Mike’s cruises too 😂

Defibrillators too

I'm trained to use those, cool.

You’ll be shagging and restarting all night then 😂

Once a week is fine 😜

The silver ladies club will make you walk the plank for desertion of duty then

Sandy, her indoors is too much for me, how on earth am I going to satisfy the blue rinse brigade?!

Fair enough, I’ll send a letter of capitulation ahead for you 😂