True story, was at a wedding 12 years ago, had a few drinks, starting chatting with a lesbian couple, turns out they were having trouble conceiving. Told them my wife got pregnant at 39 after I fed her medium rare lamb and goat racks from the farmer’s market, grilled with only salt and olive oil. Told them to eat some rare lamb and goat.

Turns out they were vegans, didn’t appreciate my *help*.