There needs to be a configurable flag on relays so that clients know if they should auto-add or not.

Doesn't enforce anything obviously, but avoids you having to make the choice not to 'nuke' everyone.

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Like, I want mine to be nuked so I can actually know what to scale the vm to. I'd like something to advertise that.

Someone else might want their relay to just save their notes and a few others on a tiny vm.