Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet, he scares the crap out of it.
Someone once asked Chuck Norris how many push ups he can do. He simply replied "All of them."
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When Chuck Norris lifts dumbbells, they get smarter.
Chuck Norris once went to The Virgin Islands. Now they're just The Islands.
Chuck Norris once took a lie detector test.
The machine confessed everything.
